Thoughts
Now Playing: where are you now by Justin Bieber

How to make this seem not so life disappointing at this period of time? 

1. Act like it doesn't matter.

 2. Pretend that it didn't ever matter and happen.

3. Believe that the present and the future is more important than the past.  

 I choose 3 as the best choice.  

4. Make life so busy and exciting that it seems like it never happened.

Choice 4 sounds pretty good also.  

 p.s. Somebody save me from all this disgrace

Somebody save me from my own reality

Exercise! :P
Mood:  bright
Now Playing: Everlife-Coffee at midnight
Topic: Exercise
Optimum Training Rate (OTR) Activities for Blood Type O
Aerobics: 40 - 60 minutes, 3 - 4 times/week
Brisk Walking: 30 - 40 minutes, 5 times per week
Calisthenics: 30 - 45 minutes, 3 times per week
Contact Sports: 60 minutes, 2 - 3 times per week
Cycling: 30 minutes, 3 times per week
Dancing: 40 - 60 minutes, 3 times per week
In-Line Skating: 30 minutes, 3 - 4 times per week
Jogging/Running: 30 minutes, 3 - 5 times per week
Stair Climbing: 20-30 minutes, 3 - 4 times per week
Swimming: 30 - 45 minutes, 3 - 4 times per week
Treadmill: 30 minutes, 3 times per week
Weight Training: 30 minutes, 3 times per week

Too much time with family, too little time with friends.
Mood:  blue
Now Playing: Where are you now by Justin Bieber
Topic: Lonely
Man, this Justin Beiber song is making me bawl my eyes out. Just what I needed, no sarcasm. So tired of being left behind. Friends are always busy, especially those I want to see the most. Why? I want to find a job, but I cannot. Too far away, or not experienced enough or not old enough or some other issue. Nothing makes sense, nothing makes sense anymore. I do not want to keep living like this. Take me and renew me. I am tired of "this" person I am. Why is it when I need the people the closest to me; they are gone? Or not available? I am so depressed today. I really do not understand why or how I got this way. I wish boys/men would be honest about how they are instead of always pretending that they are okay when they are not. Sadness is not weakness it is an emotion/feeling. If God didn't want boys/men to cry he would not have given them tear ducts. Real men cry. I thought that I was mostly done with being so overwhelmed and depressed. I thought it was my turn to help someone else. Why is this emptiness suddenly becoming impossible to bare? Why is it suddenly so much worse?

Wish come true!!!!!!! :)
Mood:  energetic
I get to go to Six Flags in California this weekend! Yes! I am so freakin' hackin' excited & ecstatic! Thanks God! You made my wish come true! 

Three of my biggest wishes concerning my desires :)
Mood:  cheeky
Now Playing: Free to be me- Francesca Battiselli

I want to be content in whatever dilemma I am in or whatever phase or step I am taking in life! I want to find enjoyemnt in all the little pleasures of life! Focus on those when everything seems to be going horribly!

 I want to be the girl no guy can have! I alreday am! I love my sucecss! And God's protection also has had a lot to do with it! ;)

 I want to be the girl that  has complete control over my heart, I want to do my best to guard it and not to keep falling for awesome guys with amazing personalities! Now that is going to be much harder than the prior want! :) Oh well. God will give my the strength I need! I know he will honor that desire if I honor him! :)