I am a brokenhearted girl
Torn in countless ways
I have built a bridge that everyone walks over, but dares not tear down
Inside I am dreaming of someone who will break it apart
Someone who will demolish without expecting anything in return
Who will dare to take that challenge?
Each person avoids it like a contagious disease or they do not even realize it’s there
Every human has turned their back on me; leaving me to bleed excessively on my won
I cry, yet no one knows
They cannot comprehend this pain I hold
Nor can they understand what I say or feel; even though I say it over and over again
It’s still unclear; and unknown
I feel like I am too damaged to mend
I am praying for healing
For some kind of release
I am still waiting
The things I hold back are so dear to my heart
All of it is covered by a veil
It’s see through if you come close enough
If someone took the time it could possibly make sense
But they do not
They might understand why I am this way
There is so much pain
So many things that no one understands or knows.
Every disappointment feels like a knife to the skin
Something I cannot bare, yet I am still here
I am crawling down the narrow path
It seems as though all good and all angels are fleeing for their own sake
I am left to fight this huge war alone
I am begging for attention to ease some of the hurt
It’s of little importance, yet I crave it anyway
I am two girls
One is happy and good
The other depressed and evil
Both are waging a great fight for my soul
An ocean of sadness drowns me every single day
Claiming its rightful territory
Paving my destiny
I am defenseless against it as I scream out God’s name
I am praying for mercy
A release of all the hurt and shame
Forsaken and betrayed I have stayed
Acceptance I seek and disapproval I receive
I am hoping it will change as I cry out to God
I am afraid it will not; that it will stay the same
Everyday I feel like crying and almost everyday I do
A burden I carry so heavy the weight
I have tried to let go; but I cannot
I do not have control
I feel so forsaken, forgotten, hated and betrayed
I bare my heart and rejection stares me coldly in the face
Why am I this way?
No one hears what I say, it does not matter hoe audible my voice
They do not see pain
All they see is what they think is insults and insincerity
I am sincere,
I am seeking someone who cares,
I am baring my heart,
I am begging for help,
but they all find some other way to see what I am feeling
They think my actions and words are out of anger and revenge , but their out of pain
I am desperate for someone to listen and hear
No one hears
I am waiting patiently
Solitude it so lonely
How will I survive when my spirit is so low?
I try to hide all the intense feelings
I try to be strong
I fail miserably and I hope others cannot see through the show I fake
I find that I want to sleep and be alone more than ever; for that is the only time truly can find comfort from it all